Happy Birthday, Kakashi
by mischief maker 2.0
Summary: 5 ficlets written for Kakashi's birthday. Rampant pairings. Het, yaoi, and voyeurism
1. Sakura VS Icha Icha Round 1

**A/N:** Had a bit of a party for Kakashi over at my lj this weekend, and these ficlets were the result. They were all written rather quickly and probably aren't that great, but they were fun to write anyway. :3  
**Title:** Sakura VS. Icha Icha – Round 1  
**Pairings:** KakaSaku, KakaIchaIcha  
**Warnings:** mentions of oral sex and a slight obsession with smut xD

---

"Sensei" The voice was low and teasing, a tone he'd most definitely not heard coming from _her_.

A finger hooked itself over the top of his book and pulled it down from his face, and Kakashi tried not to twitch at the interruption. The buildup had been killer, and Junko was _finally _about to score!

"Sakura," he said in a flat tone. "What can I do for you?"

She grinned mischievously as she stood before him and leaned over a little further, bringing her face closer to his. The action caused her partially unzipped top to expose the bindings holding her breasts, no doubt intentionally. "It's not what you can do for me, sensei. It's what can _I_ do for _you_?"

His eye curved in a fake smile. "Really, now." She nodded exaggeratedly as she placed a knee on the sofa next to him, followed immediately by the other until she was straddling his thighs.

"It's your birthday after all." One hand slipped into his hair and tugged his head closer as she shifted her weight from one knee to the other in a pitifully choreographed attempt at getting comfortable.

"Most would just bring cake," he offered distractedly as he felt her other hand grasp his book and try to untangle it from his grip. "Or maybe a bottle of sake." Shaking free of the persistent hand, Kakashi held the book out to the side away from both of them and squinted to make out the words of the next sentence.

"Bah, that's boring, _sensei_." The fact that she kept emphasizing the old title was not lost on him. She hadn't been his subordinate in _years_. "'Sides, I already drank the sake, and now I'm ready for dessert." Sakura took his masked face in both her hands, forcing him to look at her, before pressing her lips into his. He flailed momentarily, and switched the book to his right hand so he could actually see it. He could probably get a whole paragraph read while Sakura was distracted! She pulled away a few seconds later, and Kakashi noted that he could smell the faint scent of sake on her. Surprisingly, he guessed she'd probably only had one or two.

"Um, but it is _my _birthday, like you said," he offered. "Aren't I the one who's supposed to eat the cake?" He tried to pull the book back up to his face, but she grabbed his wrist once again.

Leaning in closer, Sakura's breath was hot against his ear as she whispered, "_I've_ got something you can eat, _sensei_."

And with that statement, Kakashi knew the exploits of Junko and the identical twins were going to have to wait for another day.


	2. Lessons Left to Teach kakaXeveryone

**A/N:** Had a bit of a party for Kakashi over at my lj this weekend, and these ficlets were the result. They were all written rather quickly and probably aren't that great, but they were fun to write anyway. :3  
**Title:** Lessons Left to Teach  
**Pairings:** Kakashi/everyone  
**Warnings:** hints of team sevenness, bisexuality, and the implied perviness of Konoha's residents

---

As Kakashi glanced up over the top of his book, he realized the party celebrating Naruto's promotion to jounin had degenerated into something that was much more fitting confined to the pages of his beloved Icha Icha than the spectacle taking place on his former student's living room floor.

Really, there were some things he was comfortable _never_ knowing about his cute, not-so-little-anymore students, he decided as he watched both Sakura _and_ Naruto rid Sasuke of his pants. And their friends, he clarified as he saw Ino round up her own little harem which even included one of his friends. _Geez, Genma. She's almost half your age_.

This was the point where he should be getting up and excusing himself on the basis of some ridiculous story that no one would buy. _Which one to use this time?_ he wondered. _Sale_ _on shampoo at the supermarket?_ _Needing to wax my chest? Oh, I know! I'm leaving Konoha to become a priest._

His thoughts were interrupted, though, by the sound of Genma hollering from across the room. "Hatake, why are you still sitting there with that damn book?"

Kakashi sighed, knowing he should've left about five minutes ago.

When Naruto joined in the harassment with, "Yeah, sensei. Look around!" he cringed. He stood up from the sofa and moved to leave, having to step over a few bodies in the process when he noticed the bind his students - former students, he amended - were in.

"Looks like I still have a few things I can teach you," Kakashi sighed, resigning himself to the fact that he wasn't leaving anytime soon.


	3. Surprises KakaSasu

**A/N:** Had a bit of a party for Kakashi over at my lj this weekend, and these ficlets were the result. They were all written rather quickly and probably aren't that great, but they were fun to write anyway. :3  
**Title:** Surprises  
**Pairings:** KakaSasu  
**Warnings:** Yaoi, oral sex, _slightly_ underage

---

Kakashi was not at all surprised when Naruto told him that Sasuke had asked about him that day they'd caught up to them at Orochimaru's lair. He'd known his ex-student had cared for him in his own quiet way. As much as he'd allow himself to at any rate, and he understood _that _much more than anyone, he imagined.

Kakashi was merely caught off-guard when, upon seeing him for the first time in years, Sasuke had shoved him against a wall and held him there with a hand firmly grasping his throat. Breaking free of his grip would probably have been easy, but curious, Kakashi decided to humor him.

That they were nearly the same height _had_ somewhat surprised the copy-ninja. It's easy to forget he'd grown up while in Sound, changed, been molded into the near-man slightly restricting his airway right then by Orochimaru, by Kabuto, and by who knows what and who else. He smiled sadly despite himself that another important chunk of time had passed, a piece he'd never get back.

Kakashi was admittedly shocked when Sasuke leaned into him and he could feel his ex-student's erection pressed against his hip. Sasuke only smirked; he always did enjoy it when he was able to surprise him.

But what stunned Kakashi the most was that, when the Uchiha dropped to his knees and began sucking him off, he did absolutely nothing to stop him.


	4. Lack of Stealth team 7

**A/N:** Had a bit of a party for Kakashi over at my lj this weekend, and these ficlets were the result. They were all written rather quickly and probably aren't that great, but they were fun to write anyway. :3  
**Title:** Lack of Stealth  
**Pairings:** team 7  
**Warnings:** mild threesome smut, bisexuality, voyeur!Kakashi, masturbation  
**A/N2:** DO go check out Sintari's voyeur!Kakashi over at her livejournal if you're into that sort of thing. She writes it the way it's _supposed_ to be written!

---

They thought they were alone, but Kakashi had always been able to conceal his presence from them. Even though they were in the tent, it was obvious what was going on by the shadows cast on the wall. If they don't want others to see, they ought to turn the lantern off, he justified.

He could see Sakura riding one of them - Sasuke. It was Sasuke, because the one thrusting into her from behind could only be Naruto with hair like that. He shivered slightly and silently adjusted the way he was sitting to allow more room in his pants. Sasuke's hands were on her breasts, and Naruto's were on her waist as he licked the back of her neck. Sakura's head fell back as a moan escaped her lips, and Kakashi carefully unzipped his pants and began to stroke.

Most people would be surprised to find out the young members of his recently reformed team were deviants, but not him. He'd known for quite some time. They were rather sloppy about hiding the fact in his opinion. He also knew what people would think if he were ever found out, but all he ever did was watch. He'd never do anything more than that with _them_.

Not surprisingly, Sakura cried out first, followed quickly by Naruto. And when she slumped lazily over Sasuke - her legs too shaky to continue, no doubt, Naruto quickly picked her up and set her aside, so he could finish Sasuke off with his mouth. Kakashi bit his lip, imagining the taste as Naruto's tongue ran up the underside of Sasuke's cock, but it was the way the dark-haired teen fisted his hands in the blond's hair, pulling him roughly down as he mumbled obscenities, that finally sent him over the edge.

The next morning, when the three grumbled sleepily at being woken just after dawn, Kakashi only smiled innocently and commented that they could waste the day away in bed as soon as they were home.


	5. Rival's Gift

**A/N:** Had a bit of a party for Kakashi over at my lj this weekend, and these ficlets were the result. They were all written rather quickly and probably aren't that great, but they were fun to write anyway. :3  
**Title:** Rival's Gift  
**Pairings:** KakaGai wtf?  
**Warnings:** uh Gai? xD

---

"Kakashi, my eternal rival!" The voice echoed loudly throughout the pub, and Kakashi briefly considered a hasty exit through the fire escape. He realized he was two seconds too late, though, when the green-clad jounin swiftly appeared in front of his table.

"Ah. Gai." Kakashi sighed, nodding his head in greeting as his self-proclaimed rival took a seat next to him. Some days there just wasn't enough alcohol. Really.

"One cannot let one's birthday pass without a celebration!" Gai declared loudly as he flagged down the nearest waitress with one hand and slapped Kakashi on the back with the other.

"Oh, I've been celebrating," he offered in defense as he gestured toward the empty beer bottle in front of him. With any luck, he'd be able to dissuade him from his bizarre need to entertain him every year for his birthday. When he glanced over at the laughing man with the bowl-cut, though, he realized it wouldn't be quite that easy.

"Nonsense. One must live life to the fullest, and special occassions even more so!"

'Oh, no. He's getting that fiery look in his eyes again,' Kakashi thought dejectedly as he realized there would be no easy out this time.

One hour and several beers later found the duo laughing together for no explicable reason whatsoever as the waitress brought two _more _beers.

"So let me ask you something," Kakashi said unexpectedly as he picked at the foil wrapper on one of the empty bottles in front of him. "You really believe that crap you're spouting off all the time?" Curiously turning his eye on his companion, he watched as a strange expression clouded Gai's face momentarily. A moment later, though, it was gone, replaced by his usual grin.

"Of course. You mustn't waste your youth - springtime or not - on what-ifs." Kakashi grinned at the response that was just so _Gai_. Perhaps running into his exuberant friend today was not such a bad thing. It beat drinking alone at any rate.

Kakashi was startled from that thought, though, when Gai then added, "I didn't get you anything for your birthday, but..." A large hand then landed heavily on his inner thigh, and made its intentions known when it began sliding upward. His only outward reaction was the raising of an eyebrow as Gai leaned closer and whispered just loud enough to hear, "If I can't make you peak in under two minutes, I'll ascend the steps of Hokage Mountain 200 times on my hands."

Kakashi grinned behind his mask and made no protest when Gai's hand found the zipper of his pants. It'd be fun to spend tomorrow on Hokage Mountain with his favorite book watching his rival climb the steps a few hundred times, after all.


End file.
